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How do you know God is sending you someone?

A clear sign that God has sent someone your way is that they respect your wishes and desires. They don't impose their wants unto you and they ask about what you want rather than always desiring things to be done their way.

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2 Corinthians 6:14

Happy marriages don’t come easy. A relationship of any kind requires some level of effort, however, sometimes we place our efforts on the wrong people. There are so many Christians who pray for a future husband/wife but don’t know what signs to look for. How do we know that someone has been sent from God? What are the signs from God about relationships that we can look for that tell us that this person is who God is leading us to?

It’s important to remember when you’re looking for someone to marry that you acquire the qualities that will also make you a good partner. In other words, if you want someone trustworthy, you should be trustworthy. Even though it’s true to some extent that opposite personalities do sometimes attract, it is untrue that opposite value systems can harmoniously co-exist.

The Bible makes it very clear in 2 Corinthians 6:14:

“Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?” Therefore it is imperative that whomever you decide to marry is on the same page as you. The person you marry can very well lead you to heaven and drag you straight to hell. The person that God has sent you to spend your life with is someone who will possess the characteristics of love expressed in 1 Corinthians 13. It is important to pray cautiously and constantly when choosing a partner. You should often ask yourself, ‘How do I know if this person was sent from God to be with me?’ Constantly, you should be looking for the signs of whether you should stay or run.

Here are 7 signs that God has sent you the one:

1. Mutual respect and understanding

Matthew 7:12

Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets. It is human nature to be selfish. To seek to fulfil our needs before the needs of others. However, when we enter into a relationship, we are tasked with the responsibility of seeking to fulfil someone else’s needs above ours. Many people don’t understand the concept of mutual respect. Accepting the thoughts and opinions of another without compromising your beliefs is a hallmark of maturity. A clear sign that God has sent someone your way is that they respect your wishes and desires. They don’t impose their wants unto you and they ask about what you want rather than always desiring things to be done their way.

2. Open communication without guilt or constant criticism

Proverbs 21:9

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. One of the signs God is leading you to the one, is that you can have open communication with this person without fear of being ridiculed or put down. After the honeymoon phase of a relationship many people find themselves romantically involved with someone who is always negative or bossy. Open communication is of utmost importance in any relationship but more so in a one that’s supposed to be leading towards marriage. I’m not only talking about average communication on a daily basis by flirty text and cute gifs, but it should be easy to communicate with this person about the difficult stuff as well. You should be able to sit down as a couple and have discussions about the future and come to some mutual agreement on matters that concern your lives together.

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If you find yourself always having to be cautious about what you say for fear of being criticised based on your opinion then it’s probably a sign that you should end that relationship.

3. Leads you to God and doesn’t cause you to compromise

Ephesians 5:23, 1 Corinthians 13:6

As mentioned before, Christians should not be unequally yoked with unbelievers, however, it is quite possible to be unequally yoked with someone of similar faith. Just because someone goes to the same church as you doesn’t mean they are right for you. One of the ways to know if God has sent you the one, is if they are leading you straight back to Christ.The person God is leading you to will be constantly seeking your best interest and never ask you to compromise on your beliefs or standards. They will pray with you and for you and your relationship will be a representation of Christ’s love for the church. 4. Trials build you up as a couple instead of tearing you apart

1 Corinthians 13:7

Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things

One of the telltale signs that a relationship is strong is if it can weather difficulties. Does your relationship completely fall apart when disagreements arise or are you able to calmly sit down with this person and work out your issues? Your answer to that question can very well be the only sign you need to know if God is leading you to this person. No one is perfect. We live in an imperfect world and therefore no relationship is perfect. The line between a successful contented relationship and a miserable one hinges on the individuals’ abilities to overcome trials within the relationship. If you want to know if God has sent you this person, look at how they deal with problems when they arise.

5. They continue to improve themselves to make the relationship better

Romans 12:2

And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. A sign that you and this person are meant to be is if the relationship gets better over time. This doesn’t happen coincidentally, both parties must be working on themselves individually, gradually improving on themselves and thereby gradually improving on the relationship. We are all born in sin and shapen in iniquity and therefore we must all look to Christ to help us become better versions of ourselves through Him. Everyday we must seek to become more like Christ and our lives and everything that surrounds it will become better as a result. One of the ways you know God has sent you the one is if you see this progression in that person’s life. If they are constantly working on aspects of themselves, there is a great chance that they will be willing to work on making the relationship better over time.

6. Trust

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Proverbs 31:11

The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. Can you honestly say that you can trust this person? If your answer is yes, take one step forward, if your answer is no, take one step back. It’s pretty obvious why trust is one of the pillars of any successful romantic relationship. When I speak about trust, I’m not only speaking about being able to trust this person not to cheat on you but also, being able to trust this person with your time, your energy and even your money. When two people are married they become as one. A lot of people end up in marriages where they don’t trust their partner to make simple decisions for the family. They live in one house but exist as two separate beings all because they have not fully combined their lives together. Can you trust this person’s opinions and choices? If so then that can be a sign that God is leading you two together.

7. Biblical confirmation

1 Corinthians 10:31

Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God. God wants to be a part of every aspect of your life, including who you marry. The Bible is one of the major ways God communicates with us, therefore when seeking guidance on any matter the first thing we should do is prayerfully open the Bible and ask God to direct us to passages of scripture regarding our situation. While asking for the opinions of friends or family, pastors/church leaders or even seeking advice from spirit-minded articles like this one are good resources, your final deciding factor on whether or not this person is the one for you should be confirmed by the word of God. It may mean, praying and fasting for a few days until you get an answer or seeking God every morning through Bible study. Whatever you have to do, do it until you get confirmation from God through His word that this is the person you’re supposed to spend the rest of your life with. Keep praying for your future husband/wife and trust that God will help you to make the right decision. Getting direct confirmation from God is the most important sign. If you have a question, query or story you’d like to share with me, please be sure to email me using the form below. I’d love to hear from you.

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